Why Motherhood?

Amy Northrop // Savor Your Saturday


December 18  

My mother, through her openness to life, gave me the gift of my life, natural and supernatural. In gratitude, twenty-two years ago, I chose the path of motherhood, so that I could give what I myself have received.

If I am honest, I also chose motherhood to give to my children that which I did not receive. My mother was forty-one when I was born. I was twenty-six when she died. I wanted to give my youth to my children. I want to be there to help them with my grandchildren.

But I am left wondering: Do the reasons for my choice really answer the question, “Why am I a mother”?

St. John said that love consists not in the fact that we have loved God, but that he has first loved us and given himself to us. So then, maybe the question to answer is, “Why did God choose me to be an open to life mother?”

And that is a question to which I don’t yet have an answer. It is, I suppose, a mystery—one hidden within my heart, and this Advent I am feeling called by Our Lord to turn my gaze there—to rest awhile alone with him in the quiet of my heart, so that he can whisper the answer to me. I wonder what he will say?

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