It Is Not Good for Man to Be Alone

Mary Schaad // Scripture: A Mother's Lens

1 Comments

October 6

I’m not alone, and I was never supposed to be.

Reading the psalm for today, I have never thought of myself as a fruitful vine and my children as olive plants. I see myself more as a withered vine, tired and melting in the sun, in desperate need of water and some shade. Someone, please come revive this vine and give it some water so that it can actually bear some fruit!

In the first reading, God observes that it is not good for man to be alone, and then Jesus confirms in the Gospel that man and woman are supposed to be joined together for life as partners. When I am going through life, I often stop and think: I can’t handle this. Why did God choose to give me a special needs child? Why did he call me to homeschool? I do not have the patience for this.

Nowhere in Scripture does it say that God gives us only what we can handle. It seems God does give us more than we can handle, so that we remember we are not called to live this life alone. God wants us to rely on him and on those he has placed in our path who help us and call us on to holiness.

Coming back to the readings for today, I see again the plan that God had for man and woman to come together in raising a family. Not only has God given me an ally in my husband, but also God wants us to invite him into our family plan as well. Who better to help us than the one who created us and knows us better than anyone? Who better to come and water this tired vine and give it a little life back than the one who planted it in the first place and cares about its growth more than anyone?

Looking around sometimes (or a lot of times), I see the house getting messy, dinner still unmade, a baby who woke up earlier than he was supposed to, kids who are behind in their math (and guess who’s the teacher), my special needs son struggling to communicate, and I‘m sure I cannot handle all this alone. Thankfully, God does not intend for me to take this on by myself. God knew from the beginning that it is not good for us to try to handle life alone. My husband plays his role in this plan and takes me, his withered vine, by the hand and leads me to the feet of Christ, who then raises the watering can over this parched and tired vine and says with a smile, “Have a drink of my living water, so that you may have life and live it abundantly.”

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Mary Schaad

I grew up in Dallas in a devout Catholic home with two brothers and two sisters. After graduating from Benedictine College I got married and had our first baby within a year. Twelve years down the road together we have four children and have not left Dallas. Raising one girl and three boys, with two on the autism spectrum, I am living my motherhood vocation in a way I could not have foreseen and everyday presents a new challenge. Looking back, I never saw myself as a homeschool mom much less raising two special needs, one very highly dependent, but God has plans to help me grow and learn to trust him in ways I could not have foreseen. I spend my days homeschooling and shuttling kids to various therapies and activities. We attend the St. Isidore Academy hybrid school twice a week on a farm in Greenville and one of my favorite things is to watch my kids get muddy during their farm chores and being totally immersed in God’s creation.

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I was very moved by your lovely reflection, and remember well the feeling of being withered, too, back in the days of raising my large family. I just want you to know that there will come a time, when your heart spends more time looking back than looking forward, that you will finally feel the full fruitfulness of your labors, and be so very glad that you gave it your all! I send my prayers and appreciation, well done, thou good and faithful servant!